…unless you are ridiculously awesome. In which case, do your thing. For the rest of the average folks, read on.
There are a lot of people obsessed with this notion that being “who you are” and “accepting yourself” is the fastest/best/most natural way to some sort of zen-like, happy existence. We have been told by society that whoever we are is who we are supposed to be and finding our happiness with it will lead us to eternal internal peace.
Personally, I think it’s bullshit. And it makes me mad. Excuse my language, but I am serious.
If I was “who I really am,” on most days, I would hardly get anything done. I would perpetuate my own downward spiral. Trust me, I speak here from experience. I’ve had to dig out of a hole I put myself in at least a handful of times. And I mean, big life-sized holes. I naturally tend to be negative, self-serving, and lazy. Glass half empty. Pessimistic. A realist? Maybe. Point is, if I stayed true to the Self I was born with, I wouldn’t like myself very much, and day-by-day, my life situation would worsen. Do you know anyone like this? A person who just keeps making bad choices or a person who never does or says anything positive? Now what kind of life do they have? Do you want it? I know you think I’m going overboard if you know me personally, but that brings me to the purpose of this blog. If you don’t like your situation or place in your own life, or even worse, you don’t like yourself, you are NOT STUCK!
You don’t have to go through life being who you are.
You can – and should – be who you want to be.
There are many things about ourselves we don’t like. Maybe it’s weakness, indecisiveness, or a general sense of unhappiness. Maybe it’s being scatterbrained (me!), unorganized, and always late. But it doesn’t have to be this way! You have the power to change who you are and refine your habits. First, you need to decide what it is that is important to you to change. I am not telling you to ask yourself what your husband wants you to change or your friend or your kid. I am asking YOU. For me, I wanted to change the general sense of negativity I had about the world. I wanted to wear those rose-colored glasses everyone told me about and see unicorns passing rainbow gas. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. I was so over everyone asking me, “What’s wrong?” After that, I wanted to change the fact that I never felt very smart. So, I found something that I love to learn about – habits, motivation, and nutrition – and I have immersed myself in it. So do I think I am an expert now? Not even close. But, I do have things I can speak on with confidence, and that has opened my world up! So now, I can definitively say that by NOT being myself for a while, my Self is changing into who I want to become.
If you are waiting for a less busy day, the kids to grow up, your house to be in order, or anything else like that, you are selling yourself short. There will never be a perfect time, the right time, or a better time. I can also assure you that there is no magic pill. If there was, everyone would take it.
The only time is NOW. You better get started!
Here is the hard truth. Nothing is going to make you healthy except eating right and exercising. Nothing is going to make you a better public speaker except to go speak in public. Nothing is going to make you a better writer except to get writing. Nothing is going to make you a better wife than to start serving. Nothing is going to make you see the good in people unless you look for it. Make sense? You have to DO THE THING, and then you will have the power. (That’s Ralph W. Emerson, in case you thought I was smart enough to think that up on my own.)
Go be the change you want to see in yourself.
Go fake it ’til you make it.
Go be a better you.
Or as we say in Beachbody Coach world,
Decide. Commit. Succeed.
One of my life’s pleasures is to help others find what they love, a healthier lifestyle, or a fresh perspective. If you’d like to chat, let me know!